Discuss whether either party was justified in his/her behavior. What are the effects of benevolent lies, silence, equivocation, or hinting, as alternatives to disclosing what could be hurtful words?
Is misleading your spouse fraud or tact?
When their marriage of more than a decade in divorce, Anaheim banker Ronald Askew sued his ex-wife for fraud because she admittedly concealed that fact that she has never felt sexually attraced to him. On wednesday, an Orange County jury agreed, and ordered Bonnette Askew to pay her ex-husband $242,000 in damages. “I’m astonished by this verdict and i’ve looked at the divorce in 62 societies,” said Helen Fisher, an american museum of natural history anthropologist who authored the recent book Anatomy of love: the natural history of monogamy, adultery and divorce. Bonnette asken, 45 acknowledged in court that she had never been sexually attracted to her husband. But she said she always loved him and noted that their marriage was not sexless and that they has two childern together. She first admitted her lack of sexual desire for him during a joint therapy session in 1991. “Iguess he confused sex with love” bonnette askew said, adding that she concealed her lack of desire because she “didnt want to hurt his male ego”. But Ronald askew, 50, said his lawsuit has more to do with honesty and integrity than sex. He felt deceived, especially because he said he repeatedly asked her before their marriage to be honest with him and reveal any important secrets. If ronald askew belive total honesty is the foundation of good marriage, fisher has a message for him: “grow up.” “Since when is anyone truly honest with anyone?” Fisher said. “Did this man really want her to say: you’re short, fat and you’re terrible in bed? Much of the world is amazed at what they see as brutal honesty in america. She was operating on an entirely different set of social values, which much of the world operates on delicacy as opposed to brutal honsty”